The Best Place To Get Fingered In The Museum of Natural History

A poem from my book MOUTHFUL

UNDER THE SEA

the best place to get fingered
in the Museum of Natural History
is under the large stairwell
right when you enter the room
with the big blue whale
next to
the northern elephant seal display
next to
a bathroom
that's rarely used

it's dark
romantic
and feels spontaneous

---

I moved to the Upper West Side three weeks before the pandemic. I immediately fell in love with the neighborhood. It had everything I wanted from New York: old world charm, good looking old people, Nora Ephron film locations, and old Jewish delis. During those 3 weeks before lockdown, I visited the Museum of Natural History everyday. It cost little to go and it was the best place to disappear. As soon as the museum reopened, I started going back weekly. I loved the bathrooms as much as I loved the stuffed animals and planetarium.

---

This poem is from my book MOUTHFUL where there are other’s like it.

You can purchase it below. I’ll send you a signed copy.

Buy MOUTHFUL.

"MOUTHFUL keeps a running lyrical tab of all of the stray, horny, quotidian, anxious but most importantly, generous thoughts racing through Matt’s handsome little head. *Chefs kiss*”

- BRONTEZ PURNELL, Author of 100 Boyfriends